Charmian Chong—London, UK
People always tell me: Pour out your heart to God. I dont know how—why— I just tell Him what I want, What I think He wants to hear.
And there is something not quite right. A barrier between us makes me question: Does God really hear my prayers? Is He really there?
Yet life goes on, The feelings of discomfort Brushed under the carpet. Surely all is well?
Being honest with yourself is a hard thing to do.
Then I am reminded of Gods love, How He made me His child According to the good pleasure of His will.
He was so happy to come to earth for me He was so glad to suffer on the cross for me He wanted to bear my sins for me
Think about His love. How can anyone be worthy of this sacrifice? Least of all Me?
Think about His love. He already knows the person that I am. I am the one who doesnt.
Who is this person He died for? I must search myself to know Who is this person God loves? To know the extent of His love
His love opens my reluctant, hardened heart. Looking into myself, reflecting deeply I see Weaknesses I could not bring myself to admit Even to myself, Sins I convinced myself were nothing, not really sins.
And yet now it is so clearX If being honest with yourself is hard Being honest with God is even harder.
This hidden, unexpected truth How can I come to Him so unworthy? Unworthy of His love, His great sacrifice And yet It is in this love, this sacrifice, that I have faith.
He knew all along what I had hidden from myself He knew and still He chose to suffer For me
With boldness I must come Before the High Priest The throne of grace To pour out what I have discovered deep Within my heart To admit the ugly truth The truth He knew all along Of who I really am
In prayer the veil is lifted my heart poured out like water before the face of the Lord
every weakness every insecurity deep within me exposed
but still the mercy of the Lord endures from everlasting to everlasting and I finally see how His mercy is as high as the heavens above and why His unfailing compassions seem new each morning
He knows more than any friend He is nearer than any sister or brother He knew from the start who I am and now I know I no longer need to pretend for my closest Friend knows the person behind the veil
My grace is sufficient for you For My strength is made perfect in weakness. (a)